


crash around me

by DesertLily



Series: Whumptober 2020 [4]
Category: The Bifrost Incident - The Mechanisms (Album), The Mechanisms (Band)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Lyfrassir Edda Joins the Mechanisms, M/M, Nightmares, Post-The Bifrost Incident, Violins, Whumptober, Whumptober 2020, mentions of body horror
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-08 01:20:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26807245
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DesertLily/pseuds/DesertLily
Summary: Nightmares were nothing new to Lyfrassir Edda. Being comforted after one most definitely was.
Relationships: Lyfrassir Edda/Marius von Raum
Series: Whumptober 2020 [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1946296
Comments: 4
Kudos: 80
Collections: Whumptober 2020





	crash around me

**Author's Note:**

> For whumptober day four: Tearful smile. May I offer some violinspector in these trying times?

Lyfrassir Edda struggled to remember Midgard as it had once been. Of course they still had memories of it. They remembered names and events that they  _ knew _ had happened. But Lyfrassir could no longer put faces to those names. They could no longer describe the places those events had taken place. All they ever saw anymore when they thought of Midgard was undiluted colour; a rainbow so bright and intense that it should never have existed. Yog-Sothoth. The Bifrost. Lyf didn’t doubt that it had hundreds of other names but they didn’t matter. They weren’t the names it had used when it had overwhelmed the entirety of Yggdrasil. A thriving star system had been reduced to an ever-changing bismuth monstrosity. The system was still there but Lyfrassir hoped all of its inhabitants were dead. Death would be a mercy to them in exchange to the alternative. And they knew the alternative well. 

Whilst they had escaped Yggdrasil, they hadn’t escaped unscathed.Not even the fastest ship could have outrun an Outer God entirely and Lyf hadn’t been using the fastest ship. It hadn’t consumed them but it had tainted them. The most obvious changes came with their eyes and their hair. Their once white hair now seemed to constantly shimmer as seemingly endless colours danced their way through it. And their eyes...their eyes now saw things others could not. They saw the colours hidden away from normal eyes; colour that they could never truly begin to explain. For the most part, Lyf liked to pretend that was the only effect the Bifrost had on them. It was the only ones they bothered making note of when they found themself picked up from the depths of space by the Mechanisms. Well that, and their newfound inability to age. 

They told no one of the damage the Bifrost had done to their mind. How could they? They barely understood it themself. Lyf just knew that if they were ever somewhere too quiet or too alone then the static would start up again; lost chanting would fill their eyes and try to worm its way into their mind. Then came their dreams...Back when they were still an inspector, sleep was a relief. It meant a few blissful hours free of having to deal with Von Raum or the others. But now...Now Lyfrassir hated sleep. They had no control when they slept. All they had was what the Bifrost deemed worthy for them to see. So they got to see Yggdrasil contort in vivid detail - as if it were a film being played in the highest quality directly into their head. They saw it every single night. They saw the way it took people and distorted them into beings that no longer resembled..anything. 

Lyfrassir liked to pretend that they were numb to their dreams. 

This night was different. These dreams were different. Once again, their dreams stole them away to Midgard but it was not simply strangers that Lyf saw this time. They were faces that they already had the names for. Co-workers. Friends. Family. Their mothers. Their sister.  _ Everyone they had known _ . Yog-Sothoth forced them to watch as each of them were distorted and reformed; amalgamated and obliterated. It made sure Lyf heard every sound and whimper they all made. It made sure Lyfrassir knew they were all still alive. No death had been granted for those they had left behind. They wanted to scream or shout or just...escape. But they couldn’t. They couldn’t wake up. They had to keep watching. They had to keep staring at the people they should have saved. If they had just been faster at working out the story behind the Black Box...If they had actually thought of others instead of simply leaving on their own...There were so many ifs and they were overwhelming. 

Finally, Lyfrassir woke up with a scream still on the tip of their tongue. Fear flooded through their veins as their heart beat a thousand times a minute. Their eyes snapped open as they bolted upright, almost colliding with someone that had been standing over them. “Shit. Lyf? Lyfrassir? Are you alright?” Von Raum. Marius. Someone they could trust. A friend. Something more. Lyfrassir didn’t say a word but they did latch onto him, moving to hug him tightly. To his credit, Marius just moved to sit on the bed, holding them close. “...It’s okay.” He tucked their head under his chin. “You’re...you’re okay.” 

They didn’t speak for a long time nor did Marius try to force them to. Lyf just let themself be held; comforted. Eventually, they realised that they were crying - sobbing, actually - into Marius’s chest. Sniffling slightly, they moved a hand to try and wipe away their tears. “...I think I might have ruined your shirt.” Their voice was barely above a whisper as they spoke. 

Marius just gave them a gentle smile, running a hand through their hair. “I never really liked this shirt anyways. It’s stolen anyways.” They got an almost-laugh out of Lyf. They doubted there were many things on the Aurora that  _ weren’t _ stolen. “But my shirt isn’t important right now. You are.” 

“Careful, Von Raum. Someone might think you’re going soft.” 

“You say that as if I’ve not always been soft towards you.” Lyfrassir’s face went every shade of red possible at that as they looked away from him. “...Do you want to talk about it?” They froze at that. Did they want to talk about it? Did...Did they want Marius to know about the nightmares that haunted them? 

“The Bifrost.” Lyf found themself whispering before they could stop themself. “Ever since Yggdrasil...It’s all I dream about. It’s all I  _ can _ dream about anymore.” They squeezed their eyes shut tightly. “It...It shows me its destruction and damage but never like this.It’s never shown me what it did to my family anymore.” Lyfrassir’s voice cracked completely as their tears started up again, running just as heavy as before. They were fairly certain they would never forget what they had seen. 

Marius was quiet for a few moments, thinking on their words carefully. He sighed. “They’d be proud of you for surviving, I think.” Lyf glanced up at him. “You faced the Bifrost face on and you survived, Lyfrassir. I don’t think many can say that. And even if they aren’t proud of you,  _ I am _ .” Marius tilted their head up to press a kiss to their lips gently. “You’re here and you’re so strong.” 

Despite everything, Lyf found themself smiling through the tears. It was shaky but it was there. “Sap.” They teased softly as Marius pushed them to gently lay back down. They watched as he picked up a violin, clearly having brought it into the room with him. “Don’t you d-”   
  
“Nothing loud.” He promised. “Just something gentle. To help you sleep.” Marius lived up to his word. There was nothing loud or abrash about the notes he played. They were soft, gentle, and soothing as Lyfrassir drifted back to sleep. For the first time in a long time, they dreamt of nothing. They slept with ease. 

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos are appreciated! Or hmu @ desert-lily on tumblr!


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